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Jobu’s back with another round of delicious shots! Bon Appétit!

Last week was a pretty busy one in the land of sports. For shots this week we’re covering some baseball, a little college football, some possible evidence tampering and even a seemingly miraculous recovery by a former Paralympics silver medalist!

Mariano Rivera Turns 42

I wrote this piece just so I could use this picture. He looks so happy!

That’s right folks. That happy man in the photograph, the best closer in the history of the game (yes, even better than Goose Gossage thinks he was himself) turned 42 last week. 42! Speculation on Rivera’s future has already begun, and we’re not even in spring training yet! Everyone wants to know if 2012 will finally be the legendary closer’s final year on the field. As usual, Rivera hasn’t given too much insight yet. “I don’t know. That’s the question that I always ask, you know. I think after this season when spring training comes up, I think I (will) have a good idea (of) what I’m going to do (Sportingnews).” He did mention that he doesn’t plan on sticking around too long, no matter how effective he is, which is probably for the best. As a lifelong Yankees fan, I want to see Rivera retire after a typical sub 2.00 ERA, 40 plus save season. That being said, he certainly has shown zero signs of slowing down, despite the week or two every season when every reporter talks about how done he is. I predict Rivera will choose May this year to have his bad week, just to keep the writers on their toes. In other news, we at Jobu’s Rum wish him a speedy recover from last week’s throat surgery.

ESPN Sits on Evidence?

Did ESPN withhold evidence that Laurie Fine knew her husband was molesting ball boys?

It seems like we can’t go a week without some new sexual controversy. From Jerry Sandusky and his locker room romps on Penn State grounds, to Syracuse assistant head coach Bernie Fine’s twenty year molestation spree, and even to Bernie Fine’s wife Laurie’s “rite of passage” sex with Syracuse players. Wait what? Yes, apparently, while Bernie was molesting ball boys, his wife was bedding all the players. Nice couple, right? Anywho, the headline says that ESPN withheld evidence, so let’s get down to that. Apparently, in 2002, Fine’s accuser first approached authorities with his allegations, complete with a legally recorded telephone conversation with Laurie Fine in which she all but admits that her husband was a child molester. At the same time that he went to the authorities, Fine’s accuser sent the phone conversation to ESPN. ESPN didn’t report on these conversations, or do anything at all with them, until last week. The excuse for sitting on this conversation was that, when they conducted their investigation of the tapes, they didn’t have any video of Laurie Fine to compare to the audio on the tape. When the allegations came out again a couple of weeks ago, ESPN had managed to get their hands on some new video of Laurie Fine. Now they had proof, so they ran with the story. How lame is that? Send a reporter to Syracuse the next day to talk to Laurie Fine. Even if she gets offended and kicks her out, you can get a voice comparison done. Clearly ESPN just didn’t do their job in this case, and they let down victims of child abuse everywhere. For shame, ESPN.

Urban Meyer is a Dirty Liar

Coaches coach. Stop crying about it, Florida.

Although this rumor technically started two weeks ago, it was not confirmed until last Monday. Yes, Urban Meyer has agreed to become the head coach of The Ohio State University. Normally such a thing wouldn’t be quite so controversial, but when you retire because of health concerns, it might piss off the fans of your former employer if you suddenly show up as coach somewhere else. Here’s what I say to Florida fans. Quit crying and move on. As they say, haters gonna hate, but coaches… they’re gonna coach. Meyer “retired” due to health and family concerns the year before too. He came back to Florida less than four months after he left. This time around it took a little longer, but he again came back to coaching. He simply got a better offer from a school that presented a better coaching challenge. Plain and simple, coaches coach because they love to coach. Don’t hate Urban Meyer, you should have known he’d be back somewhere.

Bienvenido a Miami, José Reyes

José Reyes is the new shortstop for the Florida Marlins… watch out Mets.

This news didn’t come in until late Sunday, but according to MLBTradeRumors, former New York Mets shortstop José Reyes has signed with the Florida Marlins. We discussed this briefly a few weeks ago, so it wasn’t much of a surprise to me that Reyes ended up in Florida. They have a brand new stadium and they need to put some butts in the seats. They’re going to accomplish that by signing some big ticket free agents and proving to their fans that winning is the number one priority. In the end, I think the Marlins have over-payed. The deal is for six years and will pay Reyes $106 million. Normally that would be a great deal for a 28 year old short stop who will probably win gold gloves and batting titles for the Marlins. In my opinion, Reyes’ injury history will eventually make this a bad deal for Florida, at least contractually speaking. He will probably bring the franchise enough revenue off the field that it won’t matter as much when he misses time on the field (unless he completely breaks down physically). Anyway, the Mets were apparently unwilling to guarantee the six years, which is what the Marlins had to do to get him to sign. They did what they had to do, congratulations to them. I hope Hanley Ramirez doesn’t cry about having to move to third base.

And Now, For Something Completely Different…

Here’s hoping that Monique van der Vorst’s new career goes just as well as her last one.

If anyone has seen Robin Hood: Men in Tights, they’ve seen the scene where Blinkin falls out of the lookout tree and suddenly exclaims… “I can see!!” Blinkin immediately walks into another tree and realizes he was wrong, but the joke is the ridiculousness that a fall like that could restore his eyesight. These things don’t happen, right? Tell that to Dutch 2008 Paralympic silver medalist Monique van der Vorst. When she was thirteen, Monique had a seemingly routine ankle operation that met with some complications and left her with severe nerve damage and a paralyzed leg. That didn’t stop her from taking up hand cycling, and becoming a six time European and three time World Champion at the sport. When she was hit by a car in 2008 and left completely paralyzed from the waist down, that didn’t stop her either. Later that year she won her two silver medals at the Paralympic Games in China. Last year, something finally derailed her Paralympic dreams. While training for the 2012 Paralympics in London, she fell off her bike. After the crash, her body went into convulsions and she began experiencing tingling in her legs. Soon she was walking again, and now she’s training for 2016. This time, however, she’s not training for the Paralympic games. It is van der Vorst’s dream to represent her country in the Olympics as a cyclist. She was recently signed to a professional cycling team in Holland, so it looks like her new dream is well underway. That’s your feel good story for the week.

Rivera image courtesy of: AP Photo/Ross D. Franklin
Fine image courtesy of: Creative Commons/Reuters)
Meyer image courtesy of: Andrew Weber/U.S. Presswire
Reyes image courtesy of:
Vorst image courtesy of:

Martin Stezano

About Martin Stezano

Uruguayan born and American raised with a unique perspective on the domestic and international sports scenes. It will both tickle your funny bone and enlighten your mind. Love it or hate it...just read it.

One thought on “Weekly Shots of Rum: 11/28/11 – 12/04/11

  1. I can’t believe they already cast Nathan Lane to play Laurie Fine in the movie.

    What do you mean that’s a picture of the real Laurie Fine?

    Also, in my heart of hearts, I’ve always wanted that scene in robin hood to be an homage by Mel Brooks to Ray Walston’s character in Johnny Dangerously.

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