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This past week, there was a huge controversy in the baseball world. It involved a selfish athlete taking time off during the season just because his wife was giving birth to his son. Oh wait, sorry… The controversy was actually the fact that local radio idiot Boomer Esiason had a problem with a father trying to meet his new child and help his wife out for a couple of days after the birth. The title says it all. Boomer Esiason is an idiot.

Let’s get a quick background. On 11:30 PM on Sunday, Daniel Murphy, of the New York Mets, got the call that his wife was going into labor and hopped the first flight he could find to Florida to be there. His son, Noah (8 lbs, 2 oz), was born via c-section on Monday, and Murphy stuck around another day before flying back to join the Mets. He missed two games, even though he’s allowed to take three games off according to the rules set forth in the Collective Bargaining Agreement.

Later in the week, local radio idiots took to the microphones all over the city to voice their displeasure with Murphy. Mike Francesa, one of the most bitter and hate-filled human beings that’s ever taken to the airwaves, said the following gem:

“You’re a major league baseball player. You can hire a nurse. What are you gonna do, sit there and look at your wife in the hospital bed for two days?”a

Mike Francesa
Unlike Tina Turner’s song, this guy is simply the worst. (Brigitte Stelzer/NY Post)

Well… Yes, Mike. Yes! That’s what he’s gonna friggin’ do. He’s gonna watch her, help her with the baby, get her water or whatever the hell else she wants, because she just had major surgery to remove a baby from her uterus, you bumbling Cro-Magnon idiot fool.

Sadly, Francesa’s quote wasn’t the worst thing said about the situation. As I’m sure you’ve noticed, Boomer Esiason is going to be a big part of the story. Esiason and his idiot partner Craig Carton not only admonished Murphy for taking the days off to be with his wife, they took it a step further. Let’s let his words bury him, as they can do a better job than I can:

“Quite frankly, I would have said C-section before the season starts. I need to be at Opening Day. I’m sorry. This is what makes our money. This is how we’re going to live our life. This is going to give my child every opportunity to be a success in life. I’ll be able to afford any college I want to send my kid to because I’m a baseball player.”b

Just… Wow. I’d like to buy Boomer a book about C-sections. I’ve had family members deliver babies via this way, and it’s never been fully by choice. Now, I’m no expert, so don’t get mad if I’m wrong, but I’m under the impression that, many times, C-sections happen because something might happen to the baby, or the mother. There’s some kind of risk involved in doing things the natural way, and that’s why C-sections are done. Also, it’s a major surgery that involves cutting someone open from one side to the other to take the baby out. The surgery carries several risks of its own and takes weeks to recover from. Literally weeks. You want Murphy to risk the life of his wife and his son just so he doesn’t miss the first two games of the season? There are 160 more games that he can play in. In 1998, the Yankees started 0-3 and won 114 games. Those first couple of games are not that big a deal. That being said, he could have decided to miss the first two games of the World Series if he wanted to, and I’d still say its within his right as a human being to do so.

I don’t want to make presumptions on a couple of bad quotes, but boy… Esiason and Francesa’s wives must be so happy to have such supportive husbands. If these guys don’t even justify being there for the birth of their kids, how many dishes do you think they do around the house? I bet they get home and leave their jackets in the dining room, don’t put their shoes away and leave their dirty razors in the bathroom sinks. How about supporting your wives a little bit there, guys? How about being there to meet your son? I don’t have kids, but I can’t imagine that seeing your son 3 days later (or possibly a month in Murphy’s case) is the same as being there to watch them be born.

To be fair, Murphy took the criticism in stride. He said:

“It’s going to be tough for her to get up to New York for a month. I can only speak from my experience — a father seeing his wife — she was completely finished. I mean, she was done. She had surgery and she was wiped. Having me there helped a lot, and vice versa, to take some of the load off. … It felt, for us, like the right decision to make.”c

Daniel Murphy
This guy better not have any more babies if the Mets want to win the big one. (Brad Barr-USA TODAY Sports)

No Daniel. You’re selfish and everyone should hate you. How dare you leave your baseball team to go make sure your wife was OK after getting cut open to have a baby taken out? You sir, are the worst of the worst, and should be suspended for taking advantage of the “scam and a half,”d as Francesa referred to paternity leave.

Anyway, early Friday morning, Boomer apologized for his remarks, because that’s what stupid people do when they stick their big fat foot in their mouth. Because I’m digging block quotes in this post, let’s do our due diligence and show you Boomer’s apology too, just to be fair:

“I want to say again on this radio show that in no way, shape or form was I advocating anything for anybody to do. I was not telling women what to do with their bodies … I would never do that. That’s their decision.

I apologize for putting him and his wife in the midst of a public discussion that I basically started by uttering insensitive comments that came off very insensitive. And for that I apologize.”e

He’s sorry, and for that, he’s sorry. He really is sorry. A sorry excuse for a radio sports talk show host. Francesa too. As my brother said, any time you listen to Michael Kay and find yourself vehemently agreeing with the things he’s saying (Kay blew his top while talking about Esiason’s idiocy), you know someone else is very, very wrong. Congratulations to both Daniel Murphy and his wife, hopefully the Mets have a good year, because otherwise Francesa’s going to blame little Noah.

Featured image courtesy of: The Boston Herald

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Martin Stezano

About Martin Stezano

Uruguayan born and American raised with a unique perspective on the domestic and international sports scenes. It will both tickle your funny bone and enlighten your mind. Love it or hate it...just read it.

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